I need to be growing cannabis

I am kicking myself for not having as much foresight as Benjy did

At the beginning of this exhausting pandemic, our roommate Benjy came to me with an offer, & she had done the research, & decided to grow pot plants in the garage. As consistently, Benjy had laid the groundwork for it all, & had spreadsheets for the time, money, & effort it would take to cultivate some smokable pot in our home, benjy also had a spreadsheet for the payoff, & how much shrubbery both of us would get for our invested time & effort… Since both of us had access to local cannabis dispensaries, I thought it was rather silly to put in all that work, especially since the results would not be up to the standards I was accustomed to, & cannabis dispensaries may be rather high-priced, however they also carry the best merchandise you can find someplace, so I stuck with that; It had finally reached the point where I regret our decision, & have even started buying our cannabis from Benjy because I can’t afford the dispensary any more. Benjy is not rude about it, & sell me marijuana at a nice discount, even though I absolutely should have gone into a partnership with Benjy, however had I done that, I would have saved thoUSAnds of dollars over the last year, & been able to smoke as much marijuana as I wanted. I am kicking myself for not having as much foresight as Benjy did. It took him weeks to cultivate those cannabis plants just right, with a lot of trial & error, however now Benjy is reaping the benefits. I have been beating myself up over this undoubtedly exhausting decision for weeks!